A) I love Bear Grylls, and his ridiculous excuse for a nature-themed reality TV show.

B) I also love anything making fun of Bear Grylls and his ridiculous excuse for a nature-themed reality TV show – which is why I almost wet my pants at the hilarity of the video below.

From the masterminds at Collegehumour.com comes a fantastic parody of Man Vs. Wild, set in the wild frontier of a dorm-room bash. So get out your notepads, fellow adventurers and explorers, and try to jot down as many tips as possible, so that you too can avoid starvation and death the next time you crash a wild University party.

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1. The March of Shame
2. Limited Time Offer: “World’s Greatest Terrorist Bloopers” now on VHS!
3. Even Hitler Hated “Breaking Dawn”

If you think Luke and Joe are as awesome as I do, then check out their site at BaratsandBereta.com where you can watch tons of their vids, get info about their production company, and find out where to catch them do live improv

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If you found this stuff as funny as I did, it’s from BBC’s new show “Walk on the Wild Side”.

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This is literally like watching a train wreck right before my eyes.  I love how Jimmy Kimmel replays it over and over and over in super slow-mo, despite Seth pleading for him to stop.

It’s a traumatizing moment for Seth Rogen, who just can’t seem to get much respect in Hollywood.  First the Entourage haters, now this?  Granted, Seth probably got off on the fact that he just got to touch her, but come on.  This had to bring up some old memories Seth lived through while he was attending high school in Vancouver, BC.

What’s the fallout of this whole thing?  WELL.  If you haven’t noticed, Megan Fox and her PR team have been pleading to the loyal, and ever so lucrative ComicCon crowd; assuring them that she is just an every day girl who loves video games, comic books.  She’s from Smalltown, USA!  Love her!  Fantasize about marrying such a down to earth girl!  Oh, and btw, please watch her shitty movies!

Now, enter Seth Rogen.  I would say THE KING of the SLACKERS.  You see Megan, those guys that you feel the need to win over.  The guys who will inevitably have a say on whether or not you will be casted as Wonder Woman for a three picture deal with Warner Brothers.  They look up to Seth.  Seth REALLY is the embodiment of the very crowd you want to win over.  Unfortunately, this embarrassing moment for Seth on national TV just reminded all those geeks out there about the time the hot girl in High School flirted and fluttered those puppy dog eyes in order to get someone to do their English Lit Paper.  Kiss the golden whip goodbye!

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Let me be straight; I do NOT think that acts of terrorism or the oppression of human rights is in any way funny. I DO however think that extremism, in any form or religious sect, is downright hilarious. The sheer ridiculousness of it, whether it be Islamic suicide aficionados or those terrifyingly staunch, feverish to the point of delusional, Christians from the deep South, I can’t help but find myself left with a slight smirk on my sinner’s face. I personally don’t adhere to a specific religion or set of spiritual beliefs, however I thoroughly applaud those who do, and agree that strong personal convictions are a commendable attribute (except Scientologists – those people are freaks!).

That being said, before you decide to sell all of your personal belongings, shave your head, and don a black robe and a fresh pair of Nike’s for your religious cause, remember what your mother always told you; too much of something is never a good thing. Oh, and while you’re at it, you might also want to keep in mind the one about not making faces incase the wind changes – too many a person has found his or her facial features contorted into a grotesque mask due to this unfortunate occurrence.

Check out the blooper satire below, which pokes fun not only at extremism, but also at Western-held stereotypes and common beliefs on terrorism and the Middle East (which are NOT one and the same, for all of you uneducated or just plain ignorant people out there), as well as at our deep-rooted relationship with consumerism.

Now if you will excuse me, I have important business to attend to… if you need me, I will be burning in hell, content to spend the remainder of eternity in post-secondary educated ignorance.

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What the hell is going on down there in Hollywood?  First Matt Damon freaks out on “Vinnie Chase”, or was it Adrien? I dunno?

Anyways, now, of all people, Seth Green decides to have a John Conner-esque sissy fit during a recent commercial shoot.  Ok, seriously?  Seth Green?  Come on.

The debate is on, staged or not?  I’m going to say staged.   I honestly can’t believe that Chris Griffin himself would put on his big boy voice to throw a serious temper tantrum.

Let’s break down the facts.

1) Seth was jumped outside by two guys and nobody was there to help him!

2) Enraged, Seth storms inside, yells at the producer as well as the security guard who should have been guarding the set.

3) After yelling at two people that had absolutely nothing to do with the incident, Seth flips the craft service table OVER his head (not so hard considering it’s already at neck height), and then storms off into his trailer.

Something just doesn’t come together.  How could these two men assault Seth Green and just let him go, unphased; free to call the cops and report them.

…Wait a minute.  God dammit, I’m about to pull some serious CSI shit.  Here we go.

First of all, the two men Seth speaks of weren’t just two random guys.  It was Elton John and David Furnish.  Also, let me clear this up, they weren’t trying to assault him at all.  Far from!  The  couple, after being denied the ability to adopt a baby boy from Ukraine, decided to take matters in their own hands.  They were walking down the studio lot, spotted the 3’4″ Seth Green, and just decided to reer him as their own.  Unfortunately, Green has short legs that can rapidly flail about in this dangerous whipping motion, so they just gave up and let him free.

BAM.  Broke that shit down.  Tell me I’m wrong.  I can’t be wrong, it makes too much god damned sense to.

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I was on the computer,

Watchin’ videos on YouTube,

Saw something from The Lonely Island,

Picked up my computer,

And threw it on the GROUUUUUND,

What you think I’m stupid?

I’m not a part of this system,

This sounds like ‘Like a Boss’, Jackass.

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I don’t mean physically difficult, as advances in technology and multimedia have paved the way for icy text messaged endings, and “it’s over” YouTube vids; I’m referring to the emotional turmoil of it – the tears, the guilt, the heroin relapse… the knowledge that you are about to enter into a period of unwanted celibacy until the next semi-decent guy/girl comes along (likely the most depressing factor of all).

Which is why it’s easier to enter into a state of suspended reality (in which the breakup never happened), and stalk your ex for the next six months in an attempt to convince him/her that the two of you are still in a fully committed and loving relationship. Alright, so it’s not the healthiest idea psychologically speaking, and your social life will undoubtedly suffer, but only true sacrifice can prove to your lost love just how dedicated you are; hell Van Gogh cut off his ear to show his lady just how much he loved her… at the suggestion of the voices in his head of course…

And so, to celebrate unsuccessful partings everywhere (we all know at least one), I have searched high and low to find the ultimate breakup video, and what I found will not disappoint! Check out the clip below, from a fantastic comedy troupe based out of New York called Brave Aunt Beth (and featuring none-other than my #1 make-believe boyfriend – yes there are more than one – the hilarious Nick Kocher, also of BriTANick). If this video does not make you laugh out loud at least a dozen times, I will personally come to your house and kick in your front teeth – then we will see who has a reason to be so somber and humorless…

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Last night, in response to an extortionist’s threat to expose “terrible things” about the funnyman, Letterman used his show as a forum to admit to numerous affairs with female staff members over the years.

This is shocking for two reasons:

1) David Letterman has been with the same woman – his current wife and mother of his child – since the  mid-1990s. Although infedelity runs rampant through most of Hollywood, I couldn’t help but hope the TV host and family man was immune to the temptations of sex, drugs and rock and roll. Minus the last two, respectively.

2) As disrespectful as Letterman’s behaviour obviously was, he was honest. When was the last time a public figure had the balls to straight up admit he committed adultry on live, national television? There’s something to be said for honesty in the entertainment business – regardless of why one was forced to be honest or what he was being honest about.

It reminded me of being little – when a kid in class did something really bad, but admitted to it instead of blaming the person he sat next to. Strange.

Honestly, after watching his confession, I harbour mixed emotions. I’m certainly conflicted.

I’m disappointed he chose to cheat, but I’m impressed with his honesty.

I’m confused that despite the obviously serious topic, the audience continued to laugh as though he was making a Top 10 list. 

The feminist in me wonders if the audience would’ve reacted similarily if a woman was admiting to an affair. Wouldn’t a female be written off and labelled a slut? Will Letterman be considered a pimp? Or will harsh judgement be passed in which he is forever branded a cheating asshole? At the end of the day, isn’t he just a man that made some mistakes? Who are we to judge at all?

Watch the video and decide for yourselves. For once, I’m not entirely sure where I stand.

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Well, it’s October 1^st, which means that the month of gremlins, ghosts and goblins is officially upon us, and I am THRILLED! (See what I did there? This is a Thriller post and I used the word “thrilled” – don’t say my BA isn’t good for something) I’m just a little bit too old to go trick-or-treating these days (although I am the first to admit that I went out until I was 21 because, well, free candy is free candy), but that doesn’t mean that I can’t get into the ghoulish spirit of the season.

Now we all know that I am a major fan of spoofs, parodies and knock-offs – just take a look at pretty much any one of my posts – and I have to say that I think I have come across the greatest one of all time. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon the totally cheesy, high budget epic that is the Indian version of Michael Jackson’s Thriller. This knock-off is hilarious and frighteningly accurate, as everything from the majority of the dance moves, right down to the red leather ensemble worn by the Indian Michael, are all spot on. Check it out below; and if you feel like grooving to the original (and by grooving I mean dancing around in your bedroom in sync with the music), I’ve put that one up as well. Until next time… beware whats goes bump in the night… (insert evil cackling here)

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This clever spoof from the certifiably funny team at Take180.com is chockfull of seemingly cheap laughs, but viewer beware; beneath all of the glitter, the bodysuits, and the bitchiness runs a witty and comical social commentary, critical not only of the dozens of “reality” television programs which poison our networks, but also of the audiences who tune in en-mass to support such endeavors.

So slather on yet another coat of lip-gloss, strap yourself into your highest stilettos, and have your disco stick at hand; the male model showdown of the century is about to begin, and it’s fabulous with a capital F.

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Anyways, there’s even VIRAL VIDEOS on, get this….HOW TO MAKE A VIRAL VIDEO!  Our Favorite Pothead Councilmen Kevin Nealon goes straight to the source and asks some viral video pros such as Fred, Buck (from What the Buck) and Chad Vader for tips on making the right Viral Video campaign for his upcoming stand-up DVD.

Man…I really wish I had known about this treasure trove of knowledge before spending 14 months getting my B.A.

That’s right!!  DeVry Toronto!  Class of 2008!!!!!!!!  WOOOOOOO!!!!

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MTV Canada’s Aliya-Jasmine Sovani has come under fire recently for her appearance in (and production and art direction of) the following controversial ”Save the Boobs!” campaign in support of Rethink Breast Cancer’s annual fundraiser, Boobyball.

Now, when I say “come under fire”, I’m not fucking around. The PSA’s been featured, dissected and debated by the likes of the View, ABC News, Good Morning America and CNN (to name a few), being called sexist, distasteful and downright offensive.

Some claim it’s simply an opportunity for Aliya-Jasmine to flaunt her curvaceous physique (I say, as I sit in my Liz Lemon-esque flannel pajamas); appealing to the lowest common denominator by making a cancer awareness ad seem more like a cheap beer commercial or soft core porn, while others claim that the campaign is merely doing its job by bringing much-needed attention to a cause that’s in constant need of support.

Arguments have been made that it’s setting the feminist movement back centuries; that it’s pathetic that women still have to cater to boob fetishes and maintain sex appeal while addressing a serious issue. Others have argued that the ad is simply a social commentary; that it uses irony to convey the urgency of a breast cancer cure, since, well, we all have them, right?

I say who gives a shit? Sure, it appeals to men who wait with baited breath for the arrival of their Maxim and Playboy subscriptions, but if watching Mad Men has taught me anything, it’s that the purpose of advertising is to get attention and create controversy – exactly what this ad has done.

Sure, it may be an opportunity for her to embrace her inner exhibitionist, but if anyone’s caught Aliya-Jasmine’s counter-arguments, you’d know that her cousin was recently diagnosed with the disease, and this is the star/director/producer’s way of bringing attention to both cancer and its fundraising campaign.

Any publicity is good publicity. Testimonies of doctors, experts and survivors are essential, but so is the buzz and the panache of good marketing. Isn’t this all for a great cause, anyway? I mean, as long as people are sitting up and paying attention to a pressing issue, who gives a flying fuck how that attention was garnered? Cancer awareness is a collaborative effort that requires the work and reception of society as a whole – if we’re so divided about an ad (whose shock value pales in comparison to Peta marketing, I should point out), then cancer still wins. Then everyone loses.

“Save the Boobs!” is the message. Whether it’s because you have boobs or want to motorboat them, it doesn’t matter. Lowest common denominator or not, the ad is working – we’re talking about it. Now let’s stop talking about it and work to save the god damn boobs.

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Hello Francis, I was reading your post and like sorry to say, but, I totally saw that video like three months ago and even back then it was only like…kinda funny.

Also, please stop patronizing your audience by force feeding this terrible analogy of you guys “infecting us with this crazy new wave pandemic of viral video”.  How’s this for an analogy.  Your blog is like a crackhead hooker who offered me a 3 dollar BJ in the back of my Hyundai Accent, leaving me with a bad case of genital herpes.

Slight satisfaction, huge irritation.

Booya!  Eat it, Portugal.”  -Dad

Well “Dad”, you’re absolutely right.  You may have seen some of the videos we’ve posted, you may not.  I think the big problem here is that there is just WAY too many videos to choose from at first, and with every one we write about, a thousand more videos go viral.  It’s like this pandemic has taken a life of its own!  (yeah, that’s right.  that’s one more for you.  I’ll use this analogy all I fucking want asshole.)

………….Alright, that was a bit overboard.  I’m sorry.  You got riled up, so I got riled up, and things were said that neither of us meant.  Let’s just not fight anymore.  Let’s start over shall we?

Here’s a video of 100 of the greatest VIRAL VIDEOS, in 4 minutes no less.  Hopefully this catches you up, while taking a big chunk out of our work load.  Two birds, one stone.  Nice.

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I could take a poll to see who the world feels is the biggest has-been, but that would just be like scrolling through Dr. Drew’s roster from Celebrity Rehab, so why don’t I just cut to the chase and tell you who it is: drum roll please…

It’s none other then the Mohawk donning, jewelry wearing, steroid pumping Mr. T, the original fool on the block, and the unquestionable king of the washed-up and mildly insane. Check out this amazingly horrendous music video that he made back in the day (see: late eighties) when people still found him relevant (there was no accounting for taste back then… they did wear tapered pants after all), and remember, be good to your momma, or Mr. T will come to your house and make you “cut out that jibba jabba”, for just the bargain basement price of a cheese sandwich and bus fare.

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But in this staged PSA shoot (actually a promo for Matt’s upcoming appearance on Entourage), Adrian is treated to a Christian Bale-esque verbal lashing from Damon the Director after failing to properly deliver his lines.

Is it just me (it’s not, because it’s been universally established) or is Matt Damon getting progressively more amazing as time goes on? I mean, he was always the bomb, but after Sarah Silverman’s epic “I’m Fucking Matt Damon” last year, he reached new heights of awesome.

In case you missed out on the experience of ”Fucking Matt Damon” (wordplay, ha!), here it is:

You get it? He’s the fucking bomb jeezy. (See what just happened? I love him so much I’m using weird Snoop Dogg-esque street slang.)

So moving on.

I get that the whole “staged freakout in hopes of garnering publicity” thing is getting a little old – I mean, how many times did we have to endure weird Bale-out spoofs after Christian’s shitshow? - but this bit is absolutely hilarious. Maybe it’s the fact that Matt says everything anyone’s ever thought about actors and their blooper fodder (“I’m lucky -  I get paid to be an actor, and I can’t even fucking do this!”), or maybe it’s watching Jeremy Piven attempt to calm an irate MD as he drops infinite F-bombs while Grenier stands there stammering, but I actually L-O-L’d (oh yes – laughed out LOUD) – prior to caffeine or breakfast first thing this morning. An amazing feat.

So watch and enjoy. Personally, I hope all celebrity PSAs are filmed exactly like this.

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Infomercials have become an integral part of the prime time lineup, thus infecting the masses with a manufactured need to own useless objects just because some slimy sales person insists they are necessary. Case in point, the creator of the Snuggie brand is now a millionaire, having sold hundreds of thousands of those ridiculous armed-blankets, all because massive sects of our society are incredibly lazy, and even more gullible (as well as apparently quite cold – layering clothes is SO last year after all).

And so, in honor of the Snuggie and its confusing success, here is a great spoof that is guaranteed to make you chuckle. Check it out below, and remember, if you comment on this post within the next five minutes, not only will you have the pleasure of seeing such a funny video, but you will also be immortalized on the World Wide Web… and all of that for just the low, low price of your soul! Now THAT is a deal you don’t want to miss out on…

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You know what I’m talking about. Kristin Cavallari returns to the world of reality television to wreak havoc on the gilded lives of Audrina, Speidi, Stephanie and Lo; romancing Justin Bobby and belittling Brody Jenner, all with an evil laugh and the casual toss of her long extension-ridden hair.

For everyone that lives under a rock – since I’m pretty sure 99% of the 15-35-year-old demographic knows about The Hills and can recite its roster by heart - here’s a recent Kristin interview:

HA!

Props for finally admitting The Hills is a farce.  And to Chelsea Lately for being her wicked badass self.

I have to tip my hat to Kristin for keeping it real.  I mean, for the five seasons Lauren Conrad was on the show, she failed to have even a fraction of the personality Kristin boasted in her five-minute interview.  And I don’t have anything against Lauren Conrad personally, but if I’m going to spend half an hour of my life watching bad television, I want to be entertained.  I want drama, I want controversy.  I want to watch Audrina Patridge at a loss for words. …Actually, upon second thought, that’s actually quite normal.  Instead, I’d like to see Audrina Patridge show emotion.  Any emotion.  Or . . . anything at all.  (Aside from her breasts, etc. – we’ve all seen enough of those.)

But regardless!  I want to embrace the shitshow that is reality television and pretend that what I’m seeing in front of me is actually real.  I know it’s not, you know it’s not (dear GOD, I hope you know it’s not), but if we’re going to invest in bad acting, we might as well be given a Jerry Springer-sized serving of trashy TV.  (*Note:  Despite high fashion and decent music, The Hills is trash TV.  There’s no “who’s your baby’s daddy’s daddy” episodes, but where Maury Povich-esque talk shows are low brow trash, MTV reality television is young adult-oriented high-brow trash.  Face it, it’s a tier above The Bachelor – which is also not real.  I’m sorry.)

So this is what you can look forward to this season:

Remember when Spencer’s cowboy hat totally complimented my trash TV rant?  As well as the near-cat fight?  And Holly chugging vodka out of the bottle?  This season seems to be one trailer park away from casting Bubbles, Julian and Ricky as supporting characters.  High brow trash, I tell you.

But really.  It’s entertaining, Kristin seems to be honing her acting abilities (rumour has it she’s actually dating an older businessman and has been for some time ), and there seems to be a whole lotta “what the fuck!?” going down.  But is launching another season simply beating a dead horse?  Does The Hills have the same effect when its viewers know it’s only slightly more authentic than Heidi Montag?  And why are we still so intrigued by it?

I guess we’ll see.  This season’s making headlines because of its latest cast member, but with Audrina peacing out to star in her own reality show after season six wraps (I know, right? What the shit?!), and Speidi likely choosing another medium to whore out, where can The Hills possibly continue to go, but down?

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Have you ever sat back and nodded your head in time to the beat of old school rap music, only to ponder the fate of the once glorious b-boyz who started it all? Me neither; but that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t pay homage to their chain wearing, b-box toting legacy.

Check out the video below, which comes from a witty comedy troupe based out of New York City, called Derrick Comedy, that boasts a number of talented comedians, one of whom also works as a writer for the smash hit show 30 Rock.

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Well, that’s if you define dropping the F-bomb on network television (read: NBC) as “newsworthy”. Which I do. God, I love pop culture.

During SNL’s season premiere on Saturday, new Featured Player Jenny Slate injected a whole lot of badass into a mediocre-at-best sketch with Kristen Wiig by uttering the dreaded F-word in the midst of delivering her lines.

Fucking hilarious. But her ”Oh, shit!” expression afterwards? Fucking amazing. (See what I’m doing? With the swearing in my article about swearing? Ha. Brilliant.)

Now, let’s not lie. Though SNL made a huge comeback following last year’s banner season, boundaries need to continue being pushed to keep the show relevant (oh, the joys of television) which – regardless of the fact that it was unscripted - Slate succeeded in doing. I think she just earned her season’s paycheque.

Think about it. It’s first thing on Monday morning, and instead of re-hashing Megan Fox’s hosting abilities and U2′s ability to rock it live, bloggers have taken to their laptops in droves to dissect the infamous slip-up. The clip’s already received tens of thousands of hits across the web. Frankly, Lorne Michaels couldn’t have bought better publicity if he tried. (Well, that’s probably not true. I’m sure he could buy whatever he likes – but regardless, this is pretty decent publicity.)

One episode down, a whole season to go. Here’s to SNL keeping season 34 fresh. Fuck yeah.

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