Ladies and gentlemen. Today is a dark, dark day. From this amateur video which was taken just days ago, it appears an alien mothership has broken through Earth’s atmosphere and is currently hovering over Moscow, Russia.
We’re not sure exactly why the mothership has landed, and why it chose Moscow, but what I do know is that someone better find Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum NOW! Get their asses to Area 51, have Judd Hirsh give the loveable Jewish father inspiration speech and spark up the victory dance.
We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day
I say this all all the time and I’ll say it again. In the world we live in, I wish Bill Pulman was calling the shots right now.
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